For English class last month we read the classic work of George Orwell, Animal Farm. My English teacher is awesome at least in the sense that he allows you to have a multitude of options for many assignments. I choose to do a creative writing assignment over this book. I am partially happy with at least some of my poems so i decided to post it here, if i wrote some cool and creative, it belongs on this blog.

 What you see today is a series of contemporary poems that have come about as part of pop culture. That internet is a strange, unique and wonderful world where strange people from all parts of the world reside. The ability for genius to become a viral phenomenon is often unbelievable. From what I gather, originally this concept started in the most ridiculous of place, South Park. It was originally used to satire big business, which seems fitting to my adapted purposes, seeing as I am satirizing a concept inspired in opposition to big business. I will be using the original one as an example.

1. Collect underpants

2. ?

3. Profit

                As you can see it follows a structure, has meaning, and is an art of the pen, all of which constitute poetry. They usually use 3-5 steps and are often funny, in a sarcastic sense. Step one is generally a very board statement of direction. The key here is the absurdity at which one gets from any to profiting. This important step add humor, imagination, and satire. This is also fitting in the way Squealer turns into the feared return of Jones. The question marks represent different things to different people. Instead of writing 25 words per poem, I will write many, some story related, other communist ideals related. This is to be read as a comical guide to aspiring dictators. 

How to inspire political rebellion:

1. Blame the current leader in power as the cause of everyone's sorrows

2. Sing a song together

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to steal milk and apples:

1. Make up science about the effect of milk and apples on the brain

2. Invoke fear of Jone's return

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to defend you domain from invaders:

1. Research ancient Romanian war tactics, and ambushing

2. Valiantly sink your teeth into Jone's leg

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to abuse communism:

1. Don't work

2. ????

3. PROFIT!

How to ruin a perfectly good Sunday afternoon:

1. Argue for building a windmill

2. Argue against building a windmill

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to get rid of a political rival:

1. Gather dogs

2. ????

3. PROFIT!

How to run a propaganda agency like Squealer:

1. Use large words and frame things in a deceitful way

2. Skip from side to side (This is very convincing)

3. End all argues by invoking the fear of jone's returns

4. ????

5. PROFIT!

How to rewrite laws:

1. Rule over an extremely ignorant population of workers

2. Add text to the laws in the night

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to get away with anything:

1. Do something

2. Blame it on Snowball

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to run a brutal dictatorship:

1. Brutally murder your enemies in public, with dogs (See step 1 section 9 for further directions)

2. Force the survivors into harsh work

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to commit suicide, publicly

1. Talk to snowball

2. Talk about snowball around napoleon

3. ????

4. PROFIT!

How to ruin a perfectly good book:

1. Corrupt everything that was good and pure

2. Turn Boxer into glue

3. ????

4. profit?

How to become absolute corruptly

1.  Get power

2. Get more power

3. ????

4. ABSOLUTE CORRUPTION

How to become a famous author:

1. Pick a dictator

2. Replace all the characters of his life with animals

3. ????

4. PROFIT!